Under, Up and Out

Sometimes I will repeat a behaviour and then slowly, but ever so slowly I will find a chance moment out. It hits like almost like an electric butterfly wing, but softer. Maybe more like when the sunlight hits the wings of a real one and this elegant creature, an insect really, inspires you. It’s beautiful.

Discipline helps get to certain spaces
This is true, I believe, in meditation as much as in learning a software program and challenging yourself to use it more efficiently. Once upon a time I taught people how to work their software programs. I taught some people how to use a browser. I watched all sorts of tasks become easier or I saw someone’s eyes light up once they learned the logic and parameters of a new world. I taught custodians and I taught diplomats and cosmetics executives. It was an interesting job and it took me, a former technophobe, right into a whole other level of comprehension. You see, I’d had a bad experience once with a Commodore 64 and had remained intimidated since. But believing in the value of process, and motivated of course, by some reward, I moved ahead. and then I got hooked.

Failing is great. Rebirth is better.
Recently I challenged myself and I failed. What’s that about exactly, I ask myself? And so I think about it without a lot of drama. It teaches me things, allows me to hear things, by shifting focus from what was, to what is. Improving habits requires the uncomfortable self audit, but usually in pieces, I, therefore anyone, can handle.

I read a positivity blog and it makes me smile. At #occupywallstreet, I see possibilities as much as problems. People talking all over is a good thing. So tonight, I was meeting people myself and talking theory. And it’s weird how all over town people are talking of Žižek and that makes me smile, too. How absurd is this world when philosophy is hot again? I love it.

If the current systems are failing maybe it’s time for honest reformation, and really does it matter if the beauty is as fleeting as a butterfly’s? A million butterflies? It’s a spirit that we know to be inside us. *The space inside us we cannot approach* exists in everything. It is what we need to approach. It requires us to have some type of humility and appreciation is what I think I heard tonight…there may not exist the new inks of the next thing but I think if you look around you’ll see the flutter of something.

Practice = Discipline + Peaceful ebb and flow
Like meditation. Like land of Liberty. Like free your mind and the rest will follow. The idea is out there. Rewards are there but they need to be earned. Discussing takes time. Everything takes time. Today I met, as a dreamer, with a different type of mind. We discussed critiques and it was nice. Kind of a surprise, a relaxing yet challenging one. It’s sort of like when I notice I have tension and then I let it go, maybe in my right but sometimes in my left shoulder. Anyway, the body politic and the body of the people reflect each other. We build the world we want to be in now, or at least allow people to test models we think we might want, whenever that is.

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